You've probably seen the TV bits for
the Ford Focus. The ad campaign touts the car as having great handling along
with great gas mileage, and riffs on the contrast between "both/and" on
the one hand and "either/or" on the other. Actors compare having only
one of the two features to being either large or in charge, using either nuts
or bolts, and being either loud or clear.
Mary's pregnancy landed Joseph in
what seemed a stark either/or dilemma. Matthew writes that being a righteous man, the bewildered fiance sought to terminate
the marriage on the down-low. The New International Version says that he did
this "because" he was a righteous man. But the original language
allows for a different translation: "in spite of being a righteous
man."
The "righteous" action,
according to Joseph's society and theology, was open exposure and public
disgrace. Religion read it as the only way to avoid God's displeasure (Dt
22.23-24) and Roman custom viewed it as the only way to keep other women in
line. And Joseph was a righteous man, a straight-shooter, a by-the-book kind of
guy. At the same time, it appears he held a deep desire to offer what help he
could to the woman he had sworn to care for. It seemed he had to be righteous
or merciful.
Then an angel shows up and tells him
he can do both/and instead of either/or. God, as it turns out, has a way of
reading Isaiah 7.14 that no one ever anticipated. Mary can be both pregnant and
pure, so Joseph can be both righteous and redemptive. The angel lays down a new
hermeneutic: When in doubt, relationships trump rules.
Joseph's son becomes the ultimate
practitioner of this method. Yes, the law says to stone an adulteress; it also
says a lot of other things to those holding the stones (Jo 8.7). Yes, the law
says don't murder; restored relationships provide the preventative for that sin
(Mt 5.21-24). Yes, the law says to love your neighbor; it also says you make
neighbors by loving people (Lk 10.25-37).
Verse twenty says that all of this
happened when Joseph "had considered this." The Message translation
is very good here: "While he ways trying to figure a way out." Joseph
felt himself boxed in, locked down, shut up to the unacceptable alternatives of
either being kind to Mary or true to the Bible, of either obeying the
righteousness of his religion or seeking to make peace with the woman he loved.
Then God says to him, "Joseph, you don't have to choose." Psalm 85.10
promises us that when God's kingdom comes, lovingkindness
and truth have met together; righteousness and peace have kissed each other.
The good news, the gospel, for us today is that we can be both loving and true,
both righteous and peacemakers.
At this Advent season we await with
joy the coming of a Christ whose arrival opens more doors than it closes,
builds more bridges than moats, and embraces more than it excludes. Ponder your
relationships from God's both/and perspective and watch your dreams come true.
Inclusively,
Doug
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